This will belong here somewhere

  Surely I have not been through any more loss than any one else my age.  It must be that I just don't have much ability to deal with loss. Something like that? I don't know.  My father dying was a loss. For my whole family,  so it felt like a big loss. We lost our house,  our way of life.  My mother's loss then is still something I am trying to understand.  A lot of things that I had no way of comprehending then are still occurring to me about what it must have been like for her.  She said some things,  like,  "I never wanted children and he left me with you three" and "I hate him for leaving me like this" hurt us so badly that we couldn't even begin to think why she would say such things.  Of course we all took it very personally! They were very wrong things to say in front of us for sure! and it took me many years to really look at Her Loss then.  I see it now,  realized it all years ago but still see new things once in a while.  I know her first instinct was to move us all back to her family in Japan and I still wonder why she didn't.  Sometimes I wish she had  but there is no knowing what future that would have created??

She sold out big house in Sagemont and moved us to a little house in Beverly Hills, nothing like the one in California!,  nothing like Sagemont.  but a decent enough neighborhood.  9606 Foredale Street. 

Loss when she threw Mike out of the house. That was as traumatic or more traumatic than losing Daddy. He was gone a LOT the last years,  the years he was working for NASA on Apollo 11. Putting man in the moon.  "Calling all geeks". Mike was the father figure and would be for me for the rest of my life.  And now he was Gone. He visited when he could but he was out there trying to survive himself now.  Thankfully a family, the Sweenys, took him in with their sons. But next she ejected Herbert and last me.  She said she was trying to find a new husband and we were "in the way", too much baggage. Mike got on his feet and mostly took care of Herbert.  I had the Brady family. They lived across the street on Foredale and had 2 daughters, Barbara and Pat,  near my age. Not friends for life. 

Mike got us a house and Herbert and I moved in there when Mom finally put me out, too. It quickly became a flop house, a party house, and a nightmare. The Bradys had moved out of town to Arcadia but one day I called Mrs.  Brady crying and she came and got me.